PLEASE BE FORWARNED THE FOLLOWING MAY BE GRAPHIC !!!!!!!!
I call myself the “ROACH HUNTER”, No, not that kind….the creepy crawly kind….
The kind that makes grown women scream and stop in their tracks.
I envisioned living close to the ocean…. I envisioned a little back yard..but what I did not envision creepy crawlies…
Unbeknown to me when I moved into my two bedroom apt only 8 blocks from the ocean with my own little patio/backyard is that there were roaches.
Now, I’m not unfamiliar with roaches. I did live in the Bronx, N.Y till the age of five.
We used to visit my family in Puerto Rico as a child, and with hot and humid you not only get bugs you get BIG BUGS.
And you get BIG BUGS THAT FLY. I remember one of those flying aliens getting into my hair at the age of 12.
My PHOBIAS are very real.
In the Caribbean roaches are 3-4 ” long. Now, that a roach. I have a very weak bladder and get up to go to the bathroom a gazillion times a night. However, as a small child visiting my homeland, oh hell no!!!!. To get up in the middle of the night would be to encounter Giganta-Roach. Needless to say I would stay put in bed and would get up pretty early to go pee in the safety of daylight.
Not since those childhood days have I experienced roaches in my home.
I do remember a vacation in Jamaica in which I saw one of those Giganta-Roaches in my hotel room. There was no way I would get a nights sleep in that room.
So I head off to the front desk and very politely say to the gentlemen on duty. ” I’m from Puerto Rico ( I don’t want him to think I am being a judgemental American), so I’m familiar with Giganta -Roach and there is one in my room. I don’t want to kill it but could you send someone to get it out?” He sent one of the service guys who arrived with an empty video box (remember those?).
He caught not one but TWO. Dear GOD, there were TWO of them in my room. I nearly had a heart attack when he told me that.
I’m told that the roaches in India are a foot long..won’t be going there any time soon!
So, as you can see I have quite a history with bugs.
Did you know that there are “white roaches”? They are even more horrific than a dark roach, like something out of a Hollywood Apocalypse -Horror film. I kid you not. I really freaked when I saw my first white roach.
So, why haven’t I RAIDED them or used a FOGGER, you ask.
Two reasons, very simply..I am allergic to Raid, so I will get killed before the roaches with a raid-induced asthma attack.
I have 3 cats and a dog and in order to fog you must be off premises for at least 4 hours.
Have you ever had a cat in a pet carrier? That hour drive moving was a lot of fun with three cats screaming bloody murder in the back.
So I have had to resort to natural and organic ways to get rid of the buggers.
The internet search was on……
The answer was…….are you ready?……….ORANGE OIL !!!!!!!!!!
Yup, it seems that there is something about orange oil that starts to melt their exoskeleton and they start to suffocate.
So in an old fantastic bottle I have a concoction of water,vinegar and orange oil.
Guess what it works!!!!! You spray them and they slow down or stop long enough for me to get a paper towel and crunch them.
I love that sound…the crunching sound of one dead roach..pure heaven to my ears. The small ones I just swat with my bare hands.
I have gotten really good with that trigger. I can’t wait to go to Disneyland again and get on the Buzz Lightyear ride–I’m sure my score will be a lot higher.
Too bad my spray does not work on ants or spider… I have them too.
I no longer fear the roach..the fight is on and I intend to win the war.
You can call me “The Cockroach Hunter”.
