I thought I was done with this story and that I could start moving on. But wouldn’t you know it every time I start to walk away God/The Universe thunks me in the head with another piece of this puzzle dragging me back into the story. It has become quite apparent that this story is not finished–there is more to tell. The most recent piece of the story will appear in another blog post. But it has been recommended to me that I must detail certain aspects of this story.
……the story continues……
Jay Scott Berry was that long ago love that had reappeared in my life last Dec. 2011. He asked me to work with him as his personal manager for music. Via Facebook we had started communicating again. I have to admit that I had started to fall back in love with him yet again. That was the dilemma. Could I work closely with a man who I was in love with that I knew was married? I accepted the position knowing it was a path I was meant to take whatever the outcome. We started working together via Skype on an almost daily basis. Jay was becoming an integral part of my daily life once again.
He was due back in Los Angeles on Feb. 1 2012. It would be the first time I would see him in the last 15 or so years. The last time being a performance of his at the Hollywood Magic Castle that I saw with my then husband.
Jay arrives on Feb 1 2012. He comes bearing a bouquet of flowers–they were quite lovely and it was quite unexpected. The funny thing is that I had gone to Trader Joes the day prior and bought myself a bouquet of flowers and the bouquet I had bought for myself was bigger than the one he had given me. I kind of felt bad and hid the bouquet I had bought in the kitchen. And although I love getting flowers given the fact that we were supposed to be in a working relationship it did seem a bit inappropriate.
It was a long flight. He was tired and wanted to take a shower and he had dirty laundry. I told him not a problem. He could take a shower and a nap and I would put in the laundry for him. I have one of those beds that you can adjust and raise up or down. I was explaining to him how to work the remote when he says to me, “I remember we used to take naps together”…….on that note I say to him, ” hmnn I don’t trust myself in the room with you”….and I exited the bedroom. Again quite an inappropriate statement for him to be making.
When he awoke from his nap I suggested a small tour of Long Beach before we did any work. I took him to my favorite spots on the beach and to Naples, where I would love to live on the canals. It is such a European like neighborhood smack in the middle of Long Beach.
On the return drive we somehow started talking about relationships and soul mates. He asked me, “What if your soul mate was stuck in another relationship?” My response to him was, “Well, then he better get unstuck.”
We get back inside , he turns on his laptop so we can go over this appointments and schedule for the following two weeks.
He turns to me and says, “We need to talk about the elephant in the room.” “What elephant are you talking about?” “The fact that we still have feelings for each other after all of these years”, he says. I tell him, “I am still in love with you and I had feelings from the moment I saw you.” “I know, I feel the same way. I kept thinking about you on the airplane and I was getting a hard on.” Yes, he actually said that to me–is that romantic or what?
He continues, “We need to talk about this. I want to have a relationship with you but we need to set some ground rules. We can’t let a personal relationship get in the way of work.” I am quite dumbfounded to say the least. “What about your marriage?” He proceeds to tell me, “I am in love with my wife and I don’t plan on leaving her.” “Do you have an open marriage?” I ask him. “No, but I didn’t take a vow of monogamy,” he tells me. “I believe it’s implied in the marriage vows,” I respond.
He then proceeds to tell me that his wife doesn’t like to have sex. Sex has always been an issue for them. That she would rather curl up with a romance novel than be with her own husband at the end of the day. He continues to justify that if a wife doesn’t want to have sex with her husband shouldn’t he be free to get it elsewhere? This seemed all so easy for him. “Have you cheated on your wife before?” “No never” he responds. What I would eventually come to find out is that I am at least the third woman that he has cheated on his wife with.
The shock that I was feeling must have been apparent on my face because he then tells me,”Don’t give me an answer now. But just think about it please.”
seriously, when he said we needed to talk about the elephant in the room I honestly thought it was going to go more like, yes we have feelings for each other but I am happily married so let’s just keep this to a professional relationship.
……to be continued………
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December 9, 2012 at 3:10 pm
Wow curious to see how it turned out, I’ll reserve further comment until I see that, but I totally get yer shock and dismay here, but also the dilemma in which you fund yourself.
December 9, 2012 at 7:11 pm
Hello, the outcomes have been written about in past posts. Start with http://ivonnemontijo.wordpress.com/2012/06/02/a-long-ago-love/
and then go to the http://ivonnemontijo.wordpress.com/2012/07/02/confessions-of-a-wayward-soul/ series of post which then lead into
http://ivonnemontijo.wordpress.com/2012/08/27/back-to-the-beginning-part-3/
December 9, 2012 at 8:00 pm
Ok thanks. I sort of figured it went that way. I’m sorry you went through that, and I don’t think you’re a bad person or a hypocrite or whatever names you call yourself. We all have these people who are sort of… Blind spots… When it comes to our heart and our head. I guess I’d say you can choose to berate yourself (I hope you save some blame for him.. Ample, actually), or you can try to learn from it, so if and when he pops into your life again, you make sure you check that blind spot. Someone out there is worthy of you; don’t settle for anyone less. Ok shutting up now. Sorry.
December 9, 2012 at 8:12 pm
Thank you stopping by Jen. And please don’t stop commenting. I learn and grow as much from comments and the support of my readers as I go through these experiences. I know I am putting myself out there for judgement as I write about this story but I just got tired of the lies and deceptions. I prefer to open myself to judgements as long as I am telling the truth about Jay Scott Berry. Too many women have kept quiet when it comes to this man and it’s time for the truth to be told as he has 5000 “friends” on facebook that think he is some kind of spiritual leader—go figure. So, thank you for your kind words they mean a lot to me.
ivonne
December 9, 2012 at 8:16 pm
Wow ain’t facebook an interesting phenomenon? Friends, eh? Sounds like a charismatic man, and at least you know you’re not the only one who’s been drawn in by him. Still, I’m glad you are standing up to him, and more importantly, standing up for yourself. I’ll keep commenting since I’m not good at keeping my mouth shut. Lol good luck hon, hang in there…
December 9, 2012 at 8:25 pm
Well, I am currently blocked on his facebook and he has gotten a couple of other people to do the same. He writes spiritual stuff and to quote him, ” It’s all crap” to draw people in and I just want to scream liar, liar and so I am. I am doing it here on wordpress. There’s more to the story…more will be coming…..
December 9, 2012 at 10:30 pm
Wow he knows how to charm. He sounds like he has antisocial personality disorder. I’m glad you blocked him. I look forward to reading the rest. I hope you don’t mind that you’re inspiring a blog post…
December 9, 2012 at 10:33 pm
Yes, it’s called Narcisstic Personalty Disorder and is considred to be a sociopath—that is coming up next post….
December 9, 2012 at 10:47 pm
Stay strong, Ivonne. You can do so much better!!! xox
December 9, 2012 at 11:01 pm
Thank you!!!!!
December 10, 2012 at 3:54 am
Men cheat, it’s a fact! *smiling* they will lie right to your face and tell you exactly what you want to hear. I haven’t discussed this on my blog, so I can only say so much:) I was in the sex industry for 10 years and have seen and heard everything!!
Learning to trust men and yourself again takes a lot of soul searching, crying and anger! One day I’ll get courage and expose my readers to that side of my life. Huge hug to you Ivonne!!! ….Paula x
December 10, 2012 at 4:06 am
Thank you for the support Paula–the well is so deep on this guys lies it is amazing to me. And yes, I think you should do a blog on the other line of work–sounds like it would be a very intereting blog…And I love to talk and write about sex…….
xoxoox
ivonne
December 10, 2012 at 4:52 am
Thanks Ivonne! Bit scared my readers aren’t ready for it yet! xx
December 10, 2012 at 5:44 am
No, I meant a whole brand new blog jsut dedicated to that so that you will have two blogs going at the same time….different readers…
December 10, 2012 at 10:04 am
Interesting!! Will have to give that some thought:) x
December 10, 2012 at 9:02 am
I didn’t get this post for some reason? A fine line indeed and one to be wary of. I have been in your shoes…. Don’t fall his crap sweet..tempting though it may be…you are waiting for that man in your poetry..you deserve him and no one else
xx