Unruly kids and Yappy dogs…….


My two biggest pet peeves are unruly kids in public and yappy dogs on 25 ft. retractable leashes.

This morning after having gotten a tetanus shot because I had gotten bitten by a neighbor’s dog this past weekend I decided to stop at an outlet store and do a little shopping.

There were two little girls ages about 3 and 4 playing with toys on the floor at the end of an aisle blocking the aisle.  So in order to get to the aisle you had to manuever around the two little girls.

And then the banshee like screaming starts.  Five minutes later still screaming…..10 more minutes, still screaming………15 minutes, still screaming and no parental intervention.

At the 20 minute mark I could not take it any more.  I walked out of the aisle and asked this woman to please attend to her child.

Before I continue let me describe this women, early 20’s Latina woman , with dyed blond hair, blue eyes, which I am guessing since the hair was fake most likely so were the eyes, on the chubby side wearing leggings and a tight t-shirt.  Now that you have the picture in your mind, I shall continue.

She immediately got ghetto on me….I am talking hand on the hips, head swirling ghetto.  She started calling me a bitch and a few other expletives.  And told me that she knew what was wrong with her child. I believe my response was, “well in that case why don’t you control her. My mother had rules for public behavior when I was a child”.

She then said, “There’s the front door.  Why don’t you leave the store. And I am not you”.  My response was, “Obviously and I walked away”.  I believe I muttered something like Jesus Christ under my breath at which point ghetto mom walked back to the aisle I was in, hand on hips and stared at me, as if that was going to make me leave the store.

I thought this woman was going to hit me and I almost wish she had because then I would have called the cops, she would have gotten arrested and child social services would have picked up her kids.

She eventually walked away…….she eventually said to her child, “stop whining”.

Why did it take a 20 minute tantrum and a total stranger asking this woman to deal with her child before she did anything?

My mother had rules and every time before we set foot out the front door she would remind us of the behavior that was expected of us in public places.  Why do people think that it is ok for their child/brat to disturb the peace of others in public places?

My dog is not allowed in stores (exception Petco).  My dog is not allowed in restaurants or to fly beside me on a plane.  And yet my 60 lb dog is better behaved than most people’s kids.

I can guarantee you that my dog will not be disruptive inside a store, a restaurant or on an airplane.

Can you say the same of your kids?  Granted not all dogs are well-behaved or trained either.  That’s my next big pet peeve.  Small yappy dogs, totally out of control on a 25 ft retractable leash charging and barking at my 60 lb dog.  Are they nuts? Do they have some kind of death wish?

People control your dogs.  I can not just pick up my 60 lb dog and hold it in my arms in the event of a problem.  No, I had to train my dog.  Please do the same with yours because the next time one of your yappy, rat dogs comes charging at my dog I will not tell her to sit and stay, quite the contrary I will tell her to go for it.  Hmnn, maybe then you might train your unruly dogs.

So if you see some woman out in public telling a parent to control their child, it will probably be me.

If we all took a stand on such disruptive behavior maybe some of these parents might just get a clue…………

Ode to Diamond



Diamond is my black cat.  He passes away today around 5:30 pm pacific standard time, in my arms.

He was also known as “fat cat” because he loved to eat.  I finally put him on a diet about a year ago because he looked like he was going to explode like a balloon he had gotten so huge.

So, when I noticed a couple of days ago that he wasn’t eating I thought something was wrong.

Well flash back  to last Wed I noticed none of the cats were eating their dry food.  I checked the container of food it was contaminated by something that looked like small animal feces.  I checked the plastic container for holes, none to be found…still a mystery.

Replaced the food with brand new food and then noticed a couple of days ago that Diamond was not eating it.

Cats being what they are this is not unusal…it just means that you have to find a new brand of food.  I went out and brought other food, which he ate just a little bit.  Then I stared noticing that he wasn’t really eating his canned food, just licking the sauce.

So around 2:00 pm today I made an appointment for the vet for 11:00 am tomorrow.  They did have an opening today at 4:00 pm but I opted for the morning.  i am glad I did that because if my appointment was at 4:00 pm with the unusual waiting and what not, and then they take them away for x-rays I am imagining that my cat would have passed away amongst strangers which is what happened with my Dog Topaz and to this day it haunts me.

Diamond at least took his last breath in my arms…….I hope he is in heaven with Amber and Topaz.  He has not seen Topaz for five years and he has not seen Amber for three years.  I hope that they are having a happy re-union………….as for me…well I have a dead cat lying on a pet bed in the living room……

Pandora’s Box …Part Five


Yesterday my mother told me that she hated her life and did not want to be alive. She said she didn’t have the guts to do it so she asked her husband to shoot her in the head while she slept.  (She must be off of her meds.)

I told her he couldn’t do that because he would go to jail.  She said, “that’s what he said”.

My mother continued to tell me that she told my aunt to tell us (my sister and I) that if she was suddenly to tell us that she was happier.

I told her I already thought that.  I don’t know how I am going to feel when my mother passes away but I do know that I will think,” Well, I hope she is finally happy and at peace”.

I grew up under my mother’s black cloud.  As a little girl all I ever heard was how my mother felt like an 80-year-old woman and how she did not want to be alive.

What do you do with that?  I have often wondered what my life would be like if I had a happy, joyful mother.  Three weeks ago I told my sister that I thought our mother should be committed to a hospital, that she needs to be severely medicated and in therapy.  A friend told me that she can’t be committed unless she becomes a harm to herself or others.

She is a harm to me right now.  I am fighting for my emotional sanity.  I am fighting to complete my thesis.  I am fighting to rebuild my life.  I am fighting not to sink into a depression that will take me to the edge of suicide.  And I don’t know how I can be around my mother and do all of that.

I feel like I am 16 years old again, laying in bed, under the covers pretending to be asleep until it was safe to get up, until the yelling and screaming subsided.

I found a place to move my business out of my mother’s garage and she thinks it’s an awful place. It isn’t. It is a great place but she has never had a word of encouragement to say to me, ever.

I can not do this anymore.  I can no longer be that 16-year-old teenager who is tiptoeing around her mother’s emotional outbursts.

After she said that she had told her husband to shoot her she started ranting and raving about the internet and people exposing their lives for everyone to see.  She was talking about facebook and the fact that my sister allows her kids to be on facebook.  OMG, if she knew about this blog I would never hear the end of it.

She thinks she knows me, but how can she know me when I can not reveal to her how I really feel or think about anything?

She has always treated me differently than my sister.  My sister got off really easy.  I always seemed to be the scape goat.  I think part of the problem is that I look just like my mother.  I am a mini-me of my mom. She says things like, ” I don’t want you to make the same mistakes that I did”, to which my reply is usually, “They are ‘MY’ mistakes and not yours”.

My mother has always lived her life in fear of everything.  I made a conscious decision as a teenager never to live life like that.

No one makes good choices based on fear.

I think my mother should get into therapy for herself so that she can face her demons and try to be happy. But I don’t think that is possible.

My mother has made choices based on what she thought is morally right and correct.  The thing is there is only one way to do things, my mother’s way.  Any other way is just wrong.  She says she does not have a problem.  The problem is with the people that she is around.  If she could be alone she would not have problems.

So, in order for therapy to be effective my mother would have to admit that she has been wrong on the occasion.  And she can not do that.  I think she would rather be right and miserable than wrong and happy.

I have to get off this emotional rollercoaster before I feel compelled to shoot myself in the head…………

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